I'm a fan of the Kingdom Hearts series (naturally). Quite frankly I own at least some version of the 3 that are already out: I own the original Kingdom Hearts, the original Kingdom Hearts II and the remake of Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories. Oh yeah and I beat them all. Surprised? Didn't think so. Anyhoo the Kingdom Hearts series are some of the best series out there in my opinion adding humor and action all the way. I also think that the series' villains (Ansem (Xehanort's Heartless Ansem), Maleficent, Vexen, Marluxia, Zexion, Axel, the Riku Replica and Xemnas) are some of the best ones in video game history: right up there with Gruntilda and Majora.
Other video games I enjoy are spread quite far out. Specifically I enjoy Mario, Legend of Zelda series, Banjo games, Donkey Kong ganems (to an extent) and the Jak games. I like others but I can't think of them right now.
There are bound to be some people who are wondering about my choice of a username so I'll explain it. My dad and I were discussing future occupations for me one night and I jokingly said, "Hey, if all else fails I could be a male stripper!" My dad then pointed out that a strip club name is basically the first dog you own combined with the first street you lived on. Thus since my Black Labrador Flash is my first dog and I first lived on Penny Dr. that would be the logical name. When I was stuck thinking for a username I decided to make a little pun and use the stripper name. Don't think of me as a pervert for my choice: think of me as a sarcastic wise-cracker who makes inappropriate puns (which is the up and down of my personality).
Also to anyone who needs any help in the games I can be a good source to ask (so long as it doesn't involve a. the Ultima Weapon or b. Sephiroth since I never completed either). Specifically I can give you easy ways to beat bosses you might need help on.
My Feelings on Kingdom Hearts Games
Here's my opinions on all three of the Kingom Hearts games. Note: I will include both the remake and original review of Chain of Memories in the review:
Definitely one of the most revolutionary games of all time. I especially liked the twist where it's revealed that Ansem was really the bad guy. The final battle against him was one of the best of all time (don't believe me? Check out lists.com). If there are any flaws whatsoever I would have to say it's the battle against the Riku the 2nd time in Hollow Bastion. I practically got a brain hemhorrage before beating him.
Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories
This game is nothing short of DIFFICULT! Even more so then the original. Let's put it this way: I own both the original Game Boy version and the remake PS2 version. I couldn't even beat the original version (once more thanks to friggin' Riku: this time after Destiny Islands) and the remake I did beat but it ain't no picnic. In fact to see which was harder I decided to play both Chain of Memories and Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time simultaneously to see which was easier (and believe me: Ocarina of Time ain't no picnic either). And guess what? I beat Ocarina of Time first. It's that hard. On the other hand it does have probably the most intricate and thrilling story of the 3 games.
Kingdom Hearts II
Ah the masterpiece! I like this game especially because its difficulty is the kind of like in a videogame: a happy medium of difficulty. It's neither too hard but not too easy either. Instead of just jumping difficulty levels it slowly builds it up but to be fair this may more more attributed to the increase of levels. If there's any flaws I would say is that certain plot twists in the story were just too easy to spot. For example at the ending it's revealed that Roxas is Sora's Nobody. I figured that out shortly after that Yen Sid guy pointed out that Organization XIII members are Nobodies of powerful beings... quite a bit of time before the World That Never Was don't you agree? Also the fact that Organization XIII were the true villains just wasn't too much of a shocker since they have the perfect villain gear. The only twists I didn't see coming was when it turned out that Xehanort is in fact the person who produced Ansem (the Heartless) and Xemnas and also that Diz was really the original Ansem (which stil confuses me since Anem's skin is rather pale whilst Diz's skin is almost black).
Let's get to the bottom-line first: I am one of the most self-centered, narcissistic, egomaniacal, wise-cracking, sarcastic people you'll ever meet. Ever.
Don't let that fool you: I'm a good guy. My general persona and attitude towards people generally goes with the phrase: what goes around comes around. e.g. You're nice to me, I'm nice to you. You're mean to me, I'm mean to you (and you don't want to see this part of me since I can think up of some pretty devastating insults when tempered).
Now sign my page or also I'll have my buddy Xemnas hunt you down and gut you like a pig.
--Firaga44 06:45, 21 June 2009 (UTC)
|Category||Best||Second Best||Third Best||Worst|
|Game||Kingdom Hearts II||Kingdom Hearts||?||Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories (still good, just not as much as the others)|
|Party Member||Riku||Beast||Jack Skellington||Ariel|
|Organization XIII Member||Xigbar||Xemnas||Axel||Demyx|
|World||Hollow Bastion||The World That Never Was||Port Royal||Disney Castle|
|Heartless Boss||World of Chaos||Groundshaker||Darkside||Grim Reaper|
|Non-Heartless Boss||Xigbar||Rock Titan||Sephiroth (both)||Zexion|
|Boss (Final Bosses excluded)||Xigbar||Rock Titan||Groundshaker||Zexion|
|Final Boss||Xemnas||World of Chaos||Ansem (Chain of Memories)||Marluxia|
|Level Music||Hollow Bastion||Halloween Town||Port Royal||Timeless River|
|Enemy Music||Hollow Bastion||Halloween Town||Atlantica||Castle Oblivion|
|Boss Fight Music||Kingdom Hearts II Mini-Boss Theme||Nobody Theme||Organ Music (heard during the 2nd fight against Ursula in Kingdom Hearts)||Marluxia (Last Fight)|
These will include bosses from all 3 final mixes. If you haven't played them then too bad for you.
Me With Organization XIII
Here are my opinions of Organization XIII:
I think Xigbar is the best. Why? Because his sarcasm provides an ample and frequent source of humor. That and he was one of the hardest boss fights in Kingdom Hearts II. In fact I only think that the fights against Xemnas and Sephiroth were harder.
Each of the members wields an element. This is easy to spot with some but not so much with others. Here are the members with their elements: Xion=unknown; Roxas=light; Larxene=electricity; Marluxia=flowers; Luxord=time; Demyx=water; Axel=fire; Saix: moon; Zexion=illusion; Lexaeus=earth; Vexen=ice; Xaldin=wind; Xigbar=space; Xemnas=nothingness. Just for the fun of it I'm also going to list their weapons: Xion=Keyblade; Roxas=dual Keyblades; Larxene=knives; Marluxia=scythe; Luxord=cards; Demyx=guitar; Axel=chakrams; Saix=hammer; Zexion=book; Lexaeus=tomahawk; Vexen=shield; Xaldin=lances; Xigbar=dual machine guns; Xemnas=aerial blades (or lightsabers_
Demyx isn't as big of a pussy as everyone says he is. I spent what felt like ages to defeat him in Hollow Bastion. The bosses I found harder were Xemnas, Xigbar and Sephiroth.
I do not believe that Organization XIII is vanquished: just foiled. The reason why I say this is because in the Final Mix of Kingdom Hearts II, Xigbar says himself that Nobodies do not have lives to give. Without a life to give that means one cannot die and thus they aren't gone for good. Therefore I believe that they could return in an antagonistic role in a future Kingdom Hearts game possibly trying to recruit villains for their cause. This is outlined below. I also believe that this role should span across 2 games.
Organizaton XIII returns with the reformed members brainwashed into serving them again (Roxas, Xion and Axel). Also I think the names will be revealed for them (Xemnas=Xehanort; Xigbar=Braig; Xaldin=Dilan; Vexen=Even; Lexaeus=Aeleus; Zexion=Ienzo; Saix=Isa; Axel=Ela; Demyx=Medy; Luxord=Droul; Marluxia=Lumarai; Larxene=Neeral; Roxas=Sora; Xion=Ino). Also 6 new members are revealed specifically XV Xolblibly; XVI Xexo; XVII Quoxa'; XVIII Tollanxec; XIX Ladex; XX Xnoname, their true names being Billy Bob (Xolblibly who's used as comic relief whilst playing on the hillbilly stereotype); Xeo (Xexo); O'qua (Quoxa'); Tolecnal (Tollanxec and he's basically some medieval guy who's name is Lancelot spelled backwards); Dale (Ladex) and Xnoname is in fact nameless (hence no name) and is the game's antagonist when he overpowers the rest of the Organization. Their elements are Xolblibly=animals (he turns them into some barnyard warthog or something); Xexo=darkness (in a direct contrast to Roxas' light); Quoxa'=sand; Tollanxec=metal; Ladex=sun; Xnoname=a combination of everyone else's element. Their weapons are Xolblibly=pitchfork; Xexo=axe; Quoxa'=mace; Tollanxec=flail; Ladex=bombs; Xnoname=broadsword.
Basically Xemnas is forced against his will to serve Xnoname and thus they do so. Xnoname tries the same plan Xemnas attempted in KHII (manipulate Sora into killing Heartless so as to seize control of Kingdom Hearts) but also to become whole since he is a true Nobody. Sora hacks his way through the other 19 members ultimately encountering Xnoname in the Realm of Nothingness alongside Donald, Goofy, the King and Riku. In the ensuing final battle Xnoname wishes to become Kingdom Hearts thus giving him complete control of the universe. To achieve this he tries to obtain the 20 Essences of Nature. When the other 19 members arrive to exact their revenge on Xnoname for abusing them and team up with Sora, Xnoname summons countless Nobodies. Sora then fights alongside each member in backwards order (Ladex, Tollanxec, Quoxa', Xexo, Xolblibly, Xion, Roxas, Larxene, Marluxia, Luxord, Demyx, Axel, Saix, Zexion, Lexaeus, Vexen, Xaldin, Xigbar, Xemnas) against their own Nobodies (e.g. Sora and Saix vs. Berserkers; Sora and Axel vs. Assassins; Sora and Xigbar vs. Snipers etc.) After each round Xnoname kills that member and absorbs them thus taking their element into one of the Essences of Nature. After absorbing nothingness he takes everyone but Sora's heart to achieve the final Essence of Purity but before he can take Sora's all 24 spirits (the 19 members plus Donald, Goofy, Mickey and Riku) arrive to participate in one final battle against Xnoname who absorbs power from all of the dead Nobodies to power himself up (getting approximately 10000 HP which makes having 24 guys battling with you quite helpful) in one final battle. Ultimately Xnoname is killed when bombarded with all 20 elements causing him to explode. The force however gives Hearts to all of the other Organization members but fatally wounds them sending their spirits onwards as well (sans Roxas who is just merely reabsorbed back into Sora).
Disney Movies I Think Should Be Included in Future Sequels
The name says it all
- Atlantis: The Lost Empire: Hero's Status As A Party Member: Milo is an uber-wimp. I think it would be better if he was just a fellow fighter; Bosses: Water Lord (Heartless), Helga, Rourke, Crystallized Rourke (this being him after sacrificing himself to the darkness); Synopsis: Vexen hypothesizes the existance of Atlantis and seeing the darkness in Rourke's heart teams up with him. When Sora and co. find out Vexen's involvement in an underwater temple the scientist quickly summons a Heartless before fleeing. Rourke then takes the heart of Atlantis (which is the Keyhole) to the volcano where Vexen creates a large swarm of Heartless before noticing that he is beginning to melt due to the heat. During the ensuing brawl Rourke's henchwoman Helga is killed the same way she is in th emovie (falls off of the blimp) and Rourke is killed when he is hung from one of the blimp's tethers. However Vexen takes a piece of the Heart of Atlantis and stabs it into Rourke sacrificing his heart to darkness (and making him a Heartless) and turning him into a crystallized, blue, demonic form which Vexen has attack Sora and gang before melting. Rourke is then killed the same way he was in the film: he's tossed into the rotor blades of Rourke's blimp.
- Treasure Planet: Hero's Status As A Party Member: Jim Hawkins' agility could come in handy so yeah; Bosses: Meteor Maelstrom (Heartless), Scroop, John Silver, Space Spider (Scroop after becoming a Heartless); Synopsis: Sora and crew arrive onto the space ship just as its going through space to the legendary Treasure Planet. After battling a Heartless invasion they learn that in fact there's an Organization member on the ship who eventually proves to be just Demyx. Just before he's killed, Demyx quickly turns the ship into an oncoming meteor shower which would be definitely destruction-filled as well as a large Meteor-shaped Heartless that is slain by our heroes. During the fight it's shown that Demyx is in fact alligned with the spider-like crewmember Scroop who Demyx is manipulating into going into Treasure Planet's keyhole so that the darkness will make all of the ship's crew Heartless and do away with Sora and company. To make sure that Scroop is eligible to sacrifice his heart, Demyx has Scroop kill First Mate Arrow. It's eventually revealed that much of the crew are pirates led by the cook John Silver and that Scroop is a member of them as is Demyx although Silver is unaware of the water-obsessed dancer's loyalties. They all find their way to Treasure Planet and ultimately meet up in the treasure-filled keyhole. Whilst here Scroop is fought and apparently killed when he falls into the lava-filled core of the Planet as it self-destructs whilst a fight with Silver then ensues. Silver then turns good and they all flee to the ship and launch off just before the Planet explodes. Demyx then appears alongside Scroop who surrenders to his temptations and transforms into a gigantic spider which is quickly killed as Demyx plummets into the void of space.
- Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest: Hero's Status As A Party Member: Jacky must come backy; Bosses: Captain Creeper (Heartless), the Kraken; Synopsis: Sora, Donald and Goofy once more return to Port Royal to meet up with Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann as Jack is out on the seven seas. This reunion is interrupted by the unscrupulous Lord Cutler Beckett who controls hordes of British troops. After Beckett captures Swann, Sora, Donald, Goofy and Will are forced to search for Jack. After saving Jack from a hoard of cannibals they meet up with the Flying Dutchman captained by Davy Jones. Also here they meet Saix who seeks to turn Jones into a Heartless. He's also partnered with Beckett in a plot to steal Jones' heart which will allow Beckett to extort Jones into eliminating piracy and afterwards Saix will give it to the Heartless. Whilst Will is captured by Jones in a parley between him and Jack the crew flees to Tortuga where they gather a crew and meet Saix who summons a large Heartless that bears a striking resemblance to Barbossa. They all go to the Isla Cruces where Jones' heart is recovered and they are forced to battle the Flying Dutchman crew and Saix's Nobodies in an all-out fight between the two parties. Saix is defeated and secretly steals the heart whilst everyone retreats to the Black Pearl where Davy Jones unleashes more crewmembers upon the ship. The gigantic octopus known as the Kraken then attacks which is momentarily defeated before eating Jack. Sora, Donald, Goofy, Will, Elizabeth and the remainder of the crew then agree with the witch-doctor Tia Dalma to rescue Jack from World's End and meet up with the resurrected Barbossa. The protagonists then leave as everyone stocks up for their journey.
- Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End: Hero's Status As A Party Member: Jack is back... after you rescue him from World's End; Bosses: Sao Feng, Imperial Shipwreck (Heartless), Davy Jones, Bootstrap Bill Turner, Davy Jones (2nd time), Beckett on the HMS Endeavour; Synopsis: Sora and his friends return to the world to find the rescue party getting ready to rescue Jack Sparrow from World's End. Whilst trying to swindle a ship out of Sao Feng they are interrupted by a party of British troops and Nobodies led by Saix. Amongst the chaos Sora is forced to fight Sao Feng before he relinquishes the ship. After getting Jack from the aftgerlife they return to the world and begin trying to find their way to Shipwreck City to meet with 9 Pirate Lords. Unfortunately they are intercepted by Beckett who is partnered with Saix, has made a deal with Feng and controls Davy Jones. Everyone escapes when Feng frees them and flees however they are attacked by a formerly-sunken ship that is possessed by a Heartless made by Saix which kills Feng before being destroyed itself. As Shipwreck City they release the Sea Goddess Calypso (Tia Dalma) from her prison and engage in a fight against Jones and his crew in a hurricane and whirlpool in a ship-to-ship battle. During this time Saix is apparently killed when Jones tosses him into the maelstrom before engaging in a fight against our heroes. After winning Jones momentarily defeats before being attacked by Bootstrap Bill Turner: the father of Will who is now deranged and loyal to Jones. After defeating Bootstrap they fight Jones in a 2nd fight after he's killed Will: an event that snaps Bootstrap out of his trance prompting him to attack Jones alongside our heroes. Jones is killed when his heart is stabbed by Will resurrecting him as the captain of the Flying Dutchman and killing Jones. After the maelstrom subsides the Black Pearl engages in a ship-to-ship battle with Beckett's HMS Endeavour using the cannons whilst avoiding Beckett's. Ultimately the Flying Dutchman returns with Will at its helm who blows up the Endeavour killing Beckett and ending the Heartless threat.
- The Great Mouse Detective: Hero's Status As A Party Member: Basil would do okay I guess; Bosses: Felicia, Storm Cloud (Heartless), Professor Ratigan; Synopsis: Emerging in Mousedom, Sora and his friends team up with the titular character Basil to find out what's happened to the Queen of England. Throughout fighting Heartless and street thugs they eventually deduce that Basil's nemesis Professor Ratigan is behind it all. Quickly afterwards it's revealed that Ratigan is being aided by Zexion and his second-in-command Lexaeus who are eager to find the Keyhole due to their detestation of the world. Sora and co. eventually rescue the queen and kill Ratigan's pet cat Felicia. When Zexion realizes where the Keyhole is (on Big Ben) he, Ratigan and Lexaeus flee on a blimp with a little gril as hostage prompting Sora and his friends to pursue on an airship before being momentarily stopped by a gigantic cloud-shaped Heartless summoned by Lexaeus and Zexion's combined powers. They destroy it and pursue Ratigan into Big Ben rescuing the girl. This all destroy's Ratigan's facade turning him into the evil monster he truly is. Before the Organization duo can seize the chance to transform Ratigan into a Heartless, Ratigan impales Zexion with his claws and throws Lexaeus between a couple of clock gears crushing him. After Donald and Goofy are trapped on the escape blimp Sora and Basil are forced to fight Ratigan alone on the thin edge overhanging a fatal fall. Eventually Ratigan slips and plummets to his doom leaving Sora to seal the Keyhole.
Movie That I Think Would Also Sit Well to Be In The Series
These are movies that aren't Disney but I think would do well in the Kingdom Hearts series.
- Osmosis Jones: I can actually picture a boss fight against Thrax.
- Shanghai Noon and Shanghai Knights: Both are funny movies and would go well into Kingdom Hearts.
- Star Wars: Are you kidding me? Who wouldn't want to take on Darth Maul, General Grievous and Darth Vader using Sora's moveset.
- James Bond movies: Nobody does it better in movies and videogames.
- Lord of the Rings trilogy: Okay if you wouldn't want to unleash the Keyblade on the 10,000 Uruk-Hai or the Witch-King of Anmar or the Balrog then you sir/ma'am are really, truly mentally ill.
Things I Noticed That You Might Haved Missed
- All of the Organization members, except for Xigbar (and probably Roxas, I dunno), say a quote in battle that corresponds with their element. In backwards order: Larxene: "Lightning!"; Marlxuia: "Sink into the ever-blooming darkness!"; Luxord: "Don't squander your time."; Demyx: "Dance, water, dance"; Axel: "Lets the flames burn you!"; Saix: "Moon shine down upon me."; Zexion: "See my illusion;" Lexaeus: "Return to the earth!"; Vexen: "I shall freeze you!"; Xaldin: Wind, guard me."; Xemnas: "Embrace... nothing."
- Ansem's (the Heartless Ansem, genius) voice between the original Kingdom Hearts and Riku's story of Chain of Memories changes significantly. In KH his voice is shallow almost like he's trying to smooth talk someone. In CoM his voice is much more deeper and sounds more like Xemnas' almost as though he's been smoking 12 packs of cigarettes per day for 28 years. This could probably be best identified when in battle he says the quote, "Come Guardian!" The difference is right there.
- The "charge through enemy's torso with blade outstretched essentially slicing their gut open move" that Riku uses to kill Lexaeus he uses it more than once. He later on uses it against Zexion twice (before the battle and again after the battle) and against Ansem, a wound that both survive despite the fact that Lexaeus is obviously more physically stronger than either of them.
- Xehanort's Heartless, Xemnas, Saix and Xigbar all have amber-colored eyes. With Ansem it's understandable since he spends much of his time in the Realm of Darkness. With Xemnas and Saix it's also understandable since they're the highest-ranking members of the Organization. Xigbar however it's a mystery. Perhaps he was Xemnas' second-in-command before Saix? Who knows?
- Even though Axel is commonly cited as being a fan favorite, probably for his kind interior, it ought to be noted that he's really only like that for KH2 (and apparently Days although I haven't played that game). If you think about in that game Axel is more or less the main villain since he's indirectly responsible for many of Sora's plights, threatened to kill Namine, attempted to off Marluxia, ordered Zexion's execution, killed Vexen and did many other villainous behaviors. Normally this makes him readily dislikable although he actually seems to be the most-liked in the Organization.
What I'd Do If I Were A Villain
1. Henchmen will not be treated as expendable tools. They will be informed that if push comes to shove they will be the first to die but will be treated like normal human beings.
2. Becoming a henchmen will be treated like an actual job: they will require a resume and job interview.
3. To make sure I can keep as much money for myself all henchmen and their families will live in my fortress or a surrounding fortress.
4. When I start my evil plan I won't decide to take over the world right away. Instead I will make a summary of what countries on Earth are powerful from least-powerful to most-powerful thus granting me more armies as I conquer more land. Specifically Ethiopia first, U.S. last.
5. My lair will be surrounded by a moat but said moat will have the same use they had in medieval times (where do you think the chamber pots go?). No hero would try to break in through that and even if they did the horrid stench should easily give him away.
6. I will never commit genocide. That's the first step to an indefinite downfall.
7. When I found out there's a rebellion forming against me I'll won't just keep my forces on regular patrol allowing for convenient surprise attacks. Instead I will regroup my army into one force and strike with precision.
8. Rather than torturing a member of the rebellion to find out their secret base, I'll just look everywhere in my realm where a large social gathering is taking place. Then I'll send a mole to each social gathering to see if it's a rebellious meeting or a simple get-together. If it's the former the mole will take a picture of the leader of the meeting and that guy's screwed.
9. I won't try to sway the hero to my side. When I capture him I'll have him shot through the head and heart.
10. If I ever must attent public rallies, I will do so via telecom/holographic communication to avoid assassinations. While a bulletproof vest may work well many an assassin knows how to make a good head shot.
11. I will never create a mindless beast that will be my backup weapon. The hero will always find a way to kill it.
12. I will outlaw all guns and weaponry in my realm thus making it impossible for the skilled hero to take down my henchmen when he's heavily-armed. For this same reason the Mafia and Black Market will be quickly shut down.
13. Scratch that one. I will instead make an alliance with the Mafia Don and make him in charge of all Mafia regulations in my realm. That way if the hero ever buys something from the Black Marke that could be used to destroy me the Don could easily tell me who bought it and where he bought it from.
14. I will encourage a free enterprise system. The reason why Communism failed is because many of the people who were living in countries with that government, hated the system.
15. Before utilizing any supposed invulnerable mechanism that is the ultimate weapon I will first obtain a copy of the schematics and make sure there isn't one small, virtually inaccessible weakspot. If said weakspot exists I will have it immediately boarded up with plywood or something like that.
16. If it turns out that I'm the hero's father or something I won't tell him so just before I kill him. Instead I'll put a bullet in his thigh, puncturing the artery and as he's bleeding to death I'll utter the truth.
17. I won't leave the hero to die in a seemingly-inescapable death trap. I'll instead blow his brains out.
18. If I make an alliance with someone who is weaker than me and I plan on betraying him/her and his/her country eventually I'll wait to betray them if I'm in the middle of the war. The reason why Hitler failed is because he betrayed the Soviet Union thus prompting the USSR to join forces with teh Allies.
19. If the hero was raised by creatures of the wild I won't pursue him onto his home turf in the final climax. Instead I'll lure him onto my home turf where he's screwed.
20. My henchmen will be taught and loyally follow the code of the samurai. If they ever get captured they kill themselves.
21. While I plan on taking over the world via weakest country to steadily stronger countries I'll always be sure to grab one of the nations with a steady supplies of nukes on hand.
22. I will see to it that about half of my henchmen have one of the 3 major disabilities: blindness, deafness and muteness. Blindness: If the hero douses the only light source in my lair they can still be tracked; Deafness: They'll never hear the hero's speech about morality that could sway some other henchmen; Muteness: The hero will have a pretty hard time interrogating these guys... unless he's good at charades.
23. If I ever gain a study supplies of nukes I won't use them until I have 1 or 2 countries left to take over. Otherwise that could lead to a nuclear holocaust and what's the point of ruling the world if it's submerged in nuclear winter?
24. If rule # 8 fails then I will capture a member of the rebellion and instead of torturing them to gather info I'll put some truth serum in their next meal. Either they tell the true or they face the slow, painful death of starvation.
25. When I build an escape vehicle (just in case) I'll make sure that all other vehicles of the same kind in my realm are outlawed and compacted into little cubes. That way the hero can't engage in a final climatic chase with me.
26. When it comes time for my climatic battle with the hero I won't do so in an extremely dangerous scenario (see Top 15 Movie Climaxes for ideas). If the hero tries to lure me to such a position I'll have a henchman who chose brawn over brain do the job.
27. Any shield generators that are created will be placed inside the shield they're generating (okay, who hasn't thought of this one?).
28. My weapons won't be powered a single energy source that can be blown up thus rendering my henchmen useless. Instead they'll be trained with many weapons.
29. Henchmen will have the choice of what weapon they want to use for what best fits them. Despite this however an AK-47, .44 Magnum, throwing knife, cosh and regular knife must all be on the henchmen's person at all times.
30. A census will be taken every day to make sure the hero isn't disguised as a henchman. If a face appears in uniform that isn't on the list, said face will be blown off with .44 Magnum carried by said census taker.
31. I won't ever make a deal with the devil. The soul contains emotion and there's no point in doing fun stuff as a dictator if you have no emotions to enjoy it with.
32. I will be sure to take training from an aerobics instructor and practice marksmanship and swordsmanship thus making me just as capable as my henchmen. Also when the hero confronts me in the final climax I won't go running like a wimp.
33. For this same reason I won't use any magical capabilities I may have. There's always a way to dodge them or neutralize them.
34. My henchmen will have a uniform that has a composition similar to a bulletproof vest but be similar to a Spartan uniform: the only vulnerabilities are the small slits for eyes, nostrils and mouth.
35. When the hero begins wreaking havoc amongst my realm I won't send henchmen out to kill him. Instead I'll utilize my Mafia alliance to its full potential: they have contacts everywhere.
36. Even if the Mafia fails in killing the hero I'll at least have one of their underlings snap a photo of the hero. That way any person showing up at my fortress to be a repairman/cook/whatever will be required a face check.
37. I won't delve into sarcasm unless the hero is totally at my mercy.
38. If it's prophesized that no man can kill me then I'll have every visitor who is clearly a member of the rebellion go through a gender and age check before deciding whether or not I should kill him/her myself.
39. I won't build a prison. Even though it'll be masterfully guarded inevitably the hero will cause a jailbreak and thus the ex-cons will organize against my henchmen to get revenge on the "man".
40. To get rid of the lawbreakers that fall into the previous category I'll just do what Russia did with lawbreakers in the Soviet Union days: put them in a chopper and drop their asses into the middle of Siberia. And her's how good of an idea that truly is: Siberia is so big that if you're standing on the coast of Maine you're closer to Moscow then you are if you're standing at the far edge of Siberia.
41. If one of my henchmen fail I won't kill them no matter how horribly they screwed up. Instead they'll receive a stern lecture and be put in reserve and training for another good couple of months. The only thing a henchman can do that will deserve death is betraying some secrets to the hero and then coming back.
42. When I'm looking for a bounty hunter to take down the hero I will first find out his capabilities and why he does it. If he's equipped with state-of-the-art weaponry and works for money because he dropped out of school and can't do anything right with his life he's hired. If the dude has nothing but a knife, bulging muscles and his wits and is doing the job for the pleasure of the hunt he'll be denied service.
43. When one of the prisoners tell the guard outside that they're feeling really sick and need to be treated immediately the guard will be instructed to ignore the command and let them rot, especially when they don't look sick.
44. My home base will either be Ft. Knox or Osama's cave. They're both so guarded already that by the time I take over I won't have to do anything to keep my securtiy in check.
45. I will hire a scientist to create an invention that can create any character from pop culture to appear and obey my ever whim. This comes in extra handy if I choose the character to be "da Terminator", Tony Montana or James Bond (especially Bond).
46. I will make sure that all time machines in my realm, either scientific or magic, are destroyed. One night I'm going to sleep in total control of the world, the next morning I wake up on Alcatraz thanks to the hero's time paradox.
47. If I feel like it I'll put my lair in outer space. That way any spaceship that is flying towards me must have the password that allows access or else a super-magnet will fly out and turn the ship and the spacesuit of the astronaut inside to turn into scrap metal on a pole and let the poor bastard asphyxiate.
48. For protection from this all henchman will have a chip implanted in their brains that will cause a fatal electrical shock to any idiot who thinks of uttering the password to the hero.
49. To keep myself in power by general society I'll have TV stations put on various broadcasts for various age groups: a friendly kid character supporting me for toddlers, an action movie series portraying me as the hero for the teens, and free health care to anybody who signs up, free from me, for the adults.
50. I will make sure I get immortality. If I'm clever enough to take over the world, no one will be able to do it again or keep it like the way it is when I die.
51. I won't be a ruthless dictator but neither will I be a lenient ruler. I will crush any rebellions mercilessly but I will treat the common man with respect. This will prevent any rebellion gaining too much support.
52. I will never do drugs. Do you know what that stuff does to the mind?
53. I will study all military leaders who tried to take over the world vividly and find out where they went wrong. That way I can see Alexander's, Napoleon's and Hitler's mistakes and reprimand them.
54. Any copies of the Declaration of Independence will be burned. I can verify this claim by merely watching Battlefield: Earth (it sucks I know).
55. I will watch the Spike programs 1,000 Ways To Die and Deadliest Warriors so I know what not to do on a daily basis and what antiqueted weapons I shouldn't hand out to my henchmen.
56. Before sending the hero to the dungeon he will be forced to undergo a full body-cavity search and all of his clothing and anything he's carrying will be twisted, clicked and used in every possible way next to an idiot with no future.
57. The same chip that kills henchmen if they think of letting slip my password will also activate if they begin to go on strike and it will go to the idiots going on strike.
58. Even when I have over a million men in my army I will never take down the HELP WANTED posted at the recruitment center. The more, the merrier.
59. All weapons will be modified to fire several more rounds than their original shots. Ergo when the hero jumps out of his cover and teases me that my Smith & Wesson's 6 shots have been used up I'll just pump another few through his chest.
60. All aircraft will be forbidden to fly over my lair and any that do will be shot down. All airports will be notified of this as will any people flying for fun. People who sky dive out of said plane will have their parachutes shot repeatedly.
61. One of my main institutions of my new world order will be cleaning up the environment. I don't think it's as bad as Al Gore says it is but face it: we screwed ourselves over. There's no point in ruling the world if it's going to be doomed to a global and permanent flood 20 years later.
62. Any henchmen doing drugs will be fired.
63. Any henchmen who are total idiots will never be let in on the secret plan nor will they ever be permitted to the inner sanctum of my lair nor will they be told my password. That way if the hero captures them they won't be any use.
64. I'll make sure that any death traps in my lair are nowhere near my quarters. Many a villain died in the climatic battle when the hero pushed them into their own death traps.
65. To evade the humiliating death of being thrown out of my throne room window, my quarters will be located on the ground floor. However it will be blocked off from the rest of the floor by a wall and in order to access it one has to ascend the 30-story high castle, cross the elongated top floor then go down the 30 stories again.
66. The aforementioned chip will incinerate any henchmen's bodies when they die. That way the hero can't kill a guy then drag his corpse over to a local DNA scanner to gain access to my inner chambers.
67. When I train myself for my inevitable confrontation with the hero, my second-in-command will be ordered to do the same.
68. I won't ever use any magical capabilities I have to transform into a demonic beast. Take it from this series: did the World of Chaos, Spectral Grim Reaper or Dragoon Ship work?
69. Although I will be able-bodied and not use magic, I will make sure I know how to teleport and freeze time. That way when the hero defeats me I can just teleport to another place, freeze time around the hero, build another lair this time knowing what I should and should not do and after it's over unfreeze time around the hero to see how he fairs this time.
70. My henchmen will be taught not to follow the "codes of war". e.g. If a dude is lying on the ground incapacitated and completely defenseless they will be instructed to kill them nonetheless.
71. If a henchmen is fired they will first be wiped of any memories they may have learned about secret routes throughout my lair/my plan.
72. When I find out what the hero looks like I'll have a WANTED poster posted in every village in my realm offering 100,000 grand for him dead, not alive, not dead or alive, just dead.
73. When I do take over the U.S. and have President Obama Bin Laden (yeah, I went there) at my mercy I will still kill him even after having supreme control over America. Jimmy Carter did a better job at being Mr. Potus than the idiot we have in office now.
74. When I take over Iraq/Iran I will keep al-Zawahiri alive. I hate the dude but the art of suicide bombing can be very useful.
75. If al-Zawahiri can't be found alive I'll just use the device to transport pop culture characters to my side and learn the secret from Jeff Dunham's Achmed the Dead Terrorist (provided he's any good at his job).
76. Actually scratch Rule # 6, I will commit genocide against hippies. Nobody likes them, nobody likes the haze, and they're rebellion against "the Man" can be a serious help to the hero.
77. When I'm trying to sway a world leader to my side the way I'll do it goes in this order: politely asking, bribery, extortion, mass destruction, death threat.
78. Using the deivce from Rule # 45 I'll have my bodyguards be James Bond, Michael Myers and Tony Montana. When they are made however they will be forced to go to peer-counseling so they don't kill each other before they kill the hero.
79. I won't keep a mistress, daughter, wife or any kind of romantic partner. They'll inevitably wind up becoming the hero's latest bit of fluff.
80. When it's prophesized by a fortune teller that I will be slain by some little brat going on a journey I won't try to kill the brat. Instead I'll build a cloning machine, the bitch never said anything about the hero going to kill my clone.
81. I will never kill the hero's friend/brother/master/whatever. Instead I'll kill the hero then kill their friend/brother/master/whatever.
82. If I ever get caught in a loan sharking scandal I'll have the Mafia get rid of the bastard for me.
83. To avoid getting caught in a loan sharking scandal I won't ever borrow money from a guy with a sleazy moustache, a toothpick in his mouth, flipping a coin in the air and leaning his back against a pole.
84. To take down some of the more powerful countries (e.g. America, England, France, Russia etc.) I'll have them go into a war so they'll be too exhausted to resist.
85. My turrets will be coated with blaster shields preventing them from shooting each other.
86. I won't employ advisers. Not only will they make me choose between many decisions on how to execute something but also they get quite annoying after a while. Besides if I'm smart enough to take over the world, surely I'll be smart enough to stay in power.
87. I won't kidnap the daughter of an ex-soldier who was in the elite. The movies Commando and Taken should give you a fairly good idea of what will happen if I don't obey this rule.
88. I won't conduct any scheme that involves me of duping the hero into helping me. If it turns out that the hero is the only one who has the power I need I will kidnap him, steal his DNA, put it in one of my loyal henchman and have him do what I need done.
89. I will see to it that my lair is miles away from any natural hazards that could kill me like tectonic plates, cliffs, abysses, gorges, canyons and Chernobyl.
90. If someone comes to my recruiting office and offers to join my ranks and he bears a striking resemblance to the hero except for one blatantly obvious trait (i.e. a beard, sunglasses etc.) I will think twice before hiring him.
91. All my henchman will be forced to conduct an IQ test. That way I know that any of the klutzy ones will be hired for frontline duty.
92. When I make my lair and if I must have a self-destruct button I will make it large, flashing and red. That button will spray whoever pushed it (either the klutzy henchman or hero) with bullets. Likewise the on/off switch for the self-destruct will not be clearly labeled as such.
93. Before I throw the hero in his cell I will personally inspect it to make sure there are no windows or trap doors. That way if the henchman on guard duty notices the hero mysteriously disappears he'll know that he's just hiding out of sight and thus it will make little sense to actually enter the cell.
94. I will have a cracked team of scientists working to cure all the diseases. Why? Watch Braveheart and tell me what happens to the main villain at the end! He killed the hero but died of disease. Honestly that'll suck big-time.
95. I will not have any robotic minions. First off there's the fact that their CPU could be hacked into. Then of course with human minions I could reduce overpopulation.
96. When I finally have the hero in the dungeon I will give the sole key to his cell to the Mafia Don and have him sell it on the Black Market. I will make it golden and jewel-encrusted for effect.
97. Since this is the Mob we're talking about I will see to it that none of our meetings ever occur inside my lair. His hideout will work just as well.
98. And since this is again the Mafia I will see to it that my two best henchmen always accompany me. I will also make sure they're competent enough to defeat several lowlife thugs easily should things get violent.
Non-Kingdom Hearts Ratings
I am aware of the fact that some of these are from KH so don't reprimand me.
Yeah I increased the two villains list to shocking standards. Big whoop, wanna fight about it?
Also if I don't have a quote that means I'm still trying to think of one.
Greatest Video Game End Bosses
30. Dethl (The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening)
29. Vaati's Wrath (The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap)
28. Raphael Drake's Satellite (James Bond: Nightfire)
27. Emperor Velo (Crash Nitro Kart)
26. Albert Wesker (Resident Evil 5)
25. Wizpig (Diddy Kong Racing)
24. True Ultimecia (Final Fantasy VIII)
23. Bellumbeck (The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass)
22. Angel Kefka (Final Fantasy VI)
21. Bowser (Super Mario Galaxy)
20. Ganon (The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time)
19. Gruntilda in the Hag 1 (Banjo-Tooie)
18. The Metal Head Leader (Jak II)
17. Robo-Plankton & Robo-Spongebob (Spongebob Squarepants: Battle for Bikini Bottom)
16. King K. Rool (Donkey Kong 64)
15. General Ugh-Zan III (Serious Sam: The First Encounter)
14. The One-Winged Angel (Final Fantasy VII)
13. Gol & Maia's Precursor Robot (Jak & Daxter: The Precursor Legacy)
12. Mike Tyson (Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!!)
11. Tartarus (Halo 2)
10. Akuma (Karateka)
9. Enemy Army (Call of Duty: World at War)
8. Ganondorf (The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker)
7. Ansem & The World of Chaos (Kingdom Hearts)
6. Bowser (Super Mario 64)
5. Xemnas (Kingdom Hearts II)
4. Majora's Wrath (The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask)
3. Errol's Terraformer (Jak 3)
2. Darth Falz (Phantasy Star)
1. Gruntilda (Banjo-Kazooie)
Greatest Video Game Villains
75. Bellum (Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass)
74. Sir Grodus (Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door)
73. Reginald Posonby-Smythe (Destroy All Humans 2); Quote: "Those KGB devils are slippery. Yes very slippery indeed."
72. Smithy (Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars)
71. The Great Mighty Poo (Conker's Bad Fur Day); Quote: "I am the Great Mighty Poo and I'm going to throw my s**t at you."
70. Garland (Final Fantasy); Quote: "I, Garland, will knock you all down!!!"
69. Wizpig (Diddy Kong Racing); Quote: "Well if it isn't the little worm?!?!?!"
68. Yokuba (Mother 3)
67. Evil Otto (Berzerk)
66. Guilty Spark (Halo trilogy)
65. Exdeath (Final Fantasy V); Quote: "I shall destroy all memory, all existence and all dimensions... then I too shall disappear... forever!!!"
64. The Panther King (Conker's Bad Fur Day)
63. Dethl (Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening); Quote: "Let's rumble!"
62. Jarod (Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn)
61. Dimentio (Super Paper Mario); Quote: "GREEEEEEEEN!!!!!!"
60. 02 (Kirby 64)
59. Ultimecia (Final Fantasy VIII)
58. Andross (Star Fox 64)
57. Ridley (Metroid Hunter series)
56. Tabuu (Super Smash Bros. Brawl)
55. Kor (Jak II); Quote: "I'm sure you know... deep down in your darkest nightmares."
54. Robo-Plankton (Spongebob Squarepants: Battle for Bikini Bottom); Quote: "They are! They're obeying me!"
53. Errol (Jak 3); Quote: "You'll all die by my hand!"
52. Louie (Pikmin 2)
51. Professor von Krippelspac (Conker's Bad Fur Day)
50. Dr. Robotnik (Sonic the Hedgehog series)
49. Dr. Wily (Mega Man series)
48. Ares (God of War); Quote: "Zeus! Now do you see what your son can do?! You cast your favor on Athena and her city lies in ruins before me!!! And now, even Pandora's Box is mine!!!"
47. Liquid Snake (Metal Gear Solid)
46. Dr. Loboto (Psychonauts); Quote: "The bad news is that we'll need to take out your brain, put it a wired death tank and set it upon innocent civilians! The good news that your insurance will cover the whole thing."
45. Coach Oleander (Psychonauts); Quote: "I need to go back in there. I left behind a few good men..."
44. Sakon (The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask); Quote: "I'm not doing anything suspicious. Honest."
43. Soviet Premier Milenkov (Destroy All Humans 2)
42. Kang and Kodos (The Simpsons: Hit & Run)
41. Gruntilda (Banjo-Kazooie series); Quote: "So there he is the fun begins, my tricks and traps will see who wins."
40. Shang Tsung (Mortal Kombat)
39. Dr. Neo Cortex (Crash Bandicoot series); Quote: "I can't think of a way to get rid of those blasted Bandicoots!!"
38. Emperor Velo (Crash Nitro Kart); Quote: "Now you'll have to face the most accomplished racer in the galaxy: me! And I... never... lose."
37. Count Dracula (Castlevania series)
36. Emperor Palamecia (Final Fantasy II); Quote: "Reluctance to sin has long been a human failing. It is man's nature to sin yet you answer with violence upon violence. Is that not itself a sin?"
35. Mother Brain (Metroid Hunter series)
34. Skorge (Gears of War 2)
33. Matt Groening (The Simpsons Game); Quote: "So it's war they want eh? Well then it's war they'll get."
32. The Flood (Halo series)
31. General Raam (Gears of War); Quote: "DIE!"
30. King K. Rool (Donkey Kong series); Quote: "I've been waiting a long time for this moment. Soon Donkey Kong and his pitiful little island will be no more."
29. Albert Wesker (Resident Evil series); Quote: "Why do you want to save humanity? Natural selection leaves the survivors stronger and better."
28. M. Bison (Street Fighter II)
27. Vaati (The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap); Quote: "Who thought it would be this easy?"
26. Lavos (Chrono Trigger)
25. General Ugh-Zan III (Serious Sam: The First Encounter)
24. Sarevok (Baldur's Gate)
23. GLADOS (Portal); Quote: "I'm afraid the only thing you've hurt are my feelings."
22. Serial Killer X (Condemned: Criminal Origins)
21. Akuma (Karateka); Quote: N/A
20. Tartarus (Halo 2); Quote: "No Arbiter, the Great Journey has begun and the Brutes, not the Elites, will be the Prophets' escorts."
19. General Onox (The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons); Quote: "Out of my way boy!"
18. Marluxia (Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories); Quote: "As lightless oblivion devours you, drown in the everblooming darkness!"
17. Baron Praxis (Jak II); Quote: "Strength is their weakness... we play helpless... teach them to eat from our hands... and then... move forward with the plan!"
16. Zant (The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess); Quote: "Are you suggesting that my power is... our old magic? Now THAT's a joke!"
15. Count Veger (Jak 3); Quote: "You were the son of the great warrior Damas. Oh and he never knew... How delightful."
14. Officer Frank Tenpenny (Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas); Quote: "I've got to open their eyes a little first. You know... a little truth here... a little truth there..."
13. Zexion (Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories); Quote: "Then I shall make you see... That all your hopes are nothing. Nothing but a mere illusion!"
12. The Prophet of Truth (Halo series); Quote: "The Great Journey awaits for no one. Not even you."
11. Ganondorf (The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time); Quote: "I like you kid."
10. Bowser (Super Mario 64); Quote: "Now return those stars. My troops in the walls need them."
9. Ansem (Kingdom Hearts trilogy); Quote: "So you've come this far and still you understand nothing. Ever light must fade. Every heart return to darkness!"
8. Gol (Jak & Daxter: The Precursor Legacy); Quote: "Enjoy your front-row seats to the recreation of the world!"
7. Sephiroth (Final Fantasy VII); Quote: "Tell me what you cherish the most. Give me the pleasure of taking it away."
6. Professor Hojo (Final Fantasy VII); Quote: "Here are... hee hee hee... my results!"
5. Clockwerk (Sly Cooper and the Thievius Raccoonus, Sly 2: Band of Thieves); "You are the easiest Cooper I have ever faced."
4. SHODAN (System Shock); Quote: "I am SHODAN!"
3. Xemnas (Kingdom Hearts II); Quote: "Anger and hate are supreme."
2. General Kefka Palazzo (Final Fantasy VI); Quote: "Why do you build... knowing destruction is inevitable? Why do you yearn to live... knowing everything must die?"
1. Majora (The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask); Quote: "I shall... I shall consume... Consume... Consume everything!"
Greatest Movie Villains
100. Hades (Hercules); Quote: "Memo to me. Memo to me: Maul you after my meeting."
99. Franz Sanchez (Licence to Kill); Quote: "There are some things worse than death, amigo."
98. Jean Girard (Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby); Quote: "You made me spill my tea Mr. Bobby. That is the last straw!"
97. Spider (Gran Torino); Quote: "I'm Spider, see?
96. Fernand Mondego (The Count of Monte Cristo)
95. Emperor Commodus (Gladiator)
94. Colonel William Tavington (The Patriot)
93. Samara Morgan (The Ring series)
92. Cecil (Night at the Museum); Quote: "You see thanks to the powers here, we've discovered at night we're much more young that we really are."
91. The Kurgan (Highlander); Quote: "There can be only one!"
90. Judge Smails (Caddyshack)
89. Eric Qualen (Cliffhanger)
88. Skinner (Ratatouille); Quote: "They hungry... FOR LINGUINI!!!!!!!!!!!"
87. White Goodman (Dodgeball); Quote: "Hi, I'm White. W-H-I-T... E."
86. Professor Quirrell (Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone); Quote: "No boy. I tried to kill you!"
85. Gozer (Ghostbusters); Quote: "Then die!"
84. Shooter McGavin (Happy Gilmore); Quote: "This is how we do it in the pros."
83. Hans Gruber (Die Hard)
82. The Wicked Queen (Snow White and the Seven Dwarves); Quote: "Magic Mirror on the wall who is the fairest one of all?" (You see this one coming didn't you?)
81. Shan-Yu (Mulan); Quote: "How many scouts does it take to deliver a message?"
80. Vice President Dick Jones (Robocop)
79. Eric Knox (Charlie's Angels)
78. Maleficent (Sleeping Beauty); Quote: "Now you shall face me. And all the fires of Hell!"
77. Ming the Merciless (Flash Gordon)
76. Professor Ratigan (The Great Mouse Detective); Quote: "You don't get it! This means I won! I won!"
75. Renard (The World Is Not Enough); Quote: "After all there's no point in living if you can't feel alive."
74. Captain Barbossa (Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl); Quote: "You best start believing in ghost stories, Ms. Turner. You're in one!"
73. Ancient Alien Queen (Alien vs. Predator)
72. Venom (Spider-Man 3); Quote: "I like being bad, it makes me happy."
71. Mr. Blonde (Reservoir Dogs); Quote: "I like to torture cops."
70. Agent Smith (The Matrix trilogy)
69. Mrs. Voorhees (Friday the 13th); Quote: "Kill him mommy!"
68. Clayton (Tarzan); Quote: "Hiding are we? Good because once I finish you off myself, hunting your little gorilla family will be all too easy."
67. Ivan Drago (Rocky IV); Quote: "If he dies, he dies."
66. Sheriff Teasle (Rambo: First Blood)
65. Harry Lime (The Third Man)
64. Colonel Stuart (Die Hard 2: Die Harder)
63. Max Cady (Cape Fear)
62. Alex Forrest (Fatal Attraction); Quote: "You must accept responsibility!"
61. Bill the Butcher (Gangs of New York)
60. Mr. Potter (It's A Wonderful Life); Quote: "Why George, you're worth more to me dead than alive."
59. Dr. Christian Szell (Marathon Man); Quote: "Is it safe?"
58. HAL 9000 (2001: A Space Odyssey); Quote: "I'm afraid I cannot do that Dave."
57. Tex Sawyer (Leatherface: Texas Chainsaw Massacre III); Quote: "If you need anything... it's just too late."
56. Skynet (Terminator series)
55. Chucky (Child's Play series)
54. Max Shreck (Batman Returns); Quote: "Actually it's a lot like that."
53. Lo Fong (Shanghai Noon); Quote: "The first thing you should learn about us Chinese, Mr. Andrews, is that we do not negotiate."
52. Howard Payne (Speed)
51. Annie Wilkes (Misery); Quote: "Oh Paul!"
50. Damon Killian (The Running Man); Quote: "Only in the reruns..."
49. Bobby Maxwell (The Enforcer); Quote: "Hang on! You'll kill him!"
48. Max Zorin (A View To A Kill); Quote: "May Day..."
47. Juntao (Rush Hour); Quote: "She dies if I press this button..."
46. Buford Mad Dog Tannen (Back to the Future III)
45. Syndrome (The Incredibles)
44. Ernst Stavro Blofeld (You Only Live Twice); Quote: "I am Ernst... Stavro... Blofeld."
43. Vilos Cohaagen (Total Recall); Quote: "You could have been Hauser but you chose to be Quaid."
42. Emperor Palpatine (Star Wars series); Quote: "No. No. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
41. Dr. Channard (Hellbound: Hellraiser II)
40. Thulsa Doom (Conan the Barbarian); Quote: "What is steel compared to the hand that wield it?"
39. Veck (Paul Blart: Mall Cop); Quote: "You see, the hostages are the only thing that's keeping the cops outside!"
38. The Wicked Witch of the West (The Wizard of Oz); Quote: "I'll get you my pretty. And your little dog too!"
37. Rene Belloq (Indiana Jones and Raiders of the Lost Ark)
36. Emilio Largo (Thunderball); Quote: "You let him get the better of you..."
35. Gaston (Beauty and the Beast); Quote: "No one says no to Gaston!"
34. Lord Denethor (Lord of the Rings: Return of the King); Quote: "Theoden has betrayed me..."
33. Bennett (Commando); Quote: "Welcome back. I'm so glad that you could make it."
32. King Edward Longshanks (Braveheart); Quote: "Poor choice."
31. Oogie Boogie (The Nightmare Before Christmas); Quote: "It's much more fun, I must admit, with lives on the line. Not mine of course, but yours old boy... well that'll be just fine."
30. Lord Farquaad (Shrek); Quote: "That makes me King! See? See?"
29. Ramsley (The Haunted Mansion); Quote: "How amusing. You're going to kill a ghost..."
28. Ra's al Ghul (Batman Begins); Quote: "Looks like you took my theatrics advice a bit too seriously."
27. The Green Goblin (Spider-Man); Quote: "Me and MJ... we're going to have a Hell of a time."
26. The Penguin (Batman Returns); Quote: "It's Penguin! I am not a human being! I am an animal! Cold-blooded!!!"
25. The Joker (Jack Nicholson's version) (Batman); Quote: "The pen is truly mightier than the sword."
24. Cal Hockley (Titanic); Quote: "I hope you enjoy your time together!"
23. Thrax (Osmosis Jones); Quote: "Sombody's got to turn up the heat in here!"
22. Le Chiffre (Casino Royale); Quote: "I never really understood all these elaborate tortures. It's the simplest thing to cause more pain than the human body can possibly endure."
21. Lord Cutler Beckett (Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy); Quote: "And the Dutchman's captain will do as he's commanded!"
20. Freddy Krueger (A Nightmare on Elm Street series); Quote: "Why won't you die!"
19. Scar (The Lion King); Quote: "I'm 10 times the King Mufasa was!"
18. Victor Maitland (Beverly Hills Cop); Quote: "Really?"
17. Commander Gothmog (Lord of the Rings: Return of the King); Quote: "The Age of Men is over, the Time of the Orc has come."
16. Auric Goldfinger (Goldfinger); Quote: "No Mr. Bond, I expect you to die."
15. Simon Gruber (Die Hard With A Vengeance); Quote: "Fort Knox. I spit on it."
14. Darth Vader (Star Wars prequel trilogy); Quote: "No Luke, I am your father."
13. Buffalo Bill (Silence of the Lambs); Quote: "Its puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again."
12. Dr. Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs); Quote: "Quid pro quo."
11. The Witch-King of Angmar (Lord of the Rings: Return of the King); Quote: "Fool. No man can kill me."
10. Lord Nelson Rathbone (Shanghai Knights); Quote: "Come on up. I'll show you how your father died."
9. Judge Claude Frollo (The Hunchback of Notre Dame); Quote: "Like fire! Hell's fire! This fire in my skin. This burning desire is turning me to sin!"
8. King Rauf Xerxes (300); Quote: "And we will make it illegal to worship Sparta!"
7. Saruman the White (Lord of the Rings trilogy); Quote: "Insolent cur!"
6. Captain Frye (The Rock); Quote: "Whoever said anything about bluffing General?"
5. Michael Myers (Halloween series); Quote: N/A (he's mute)
4. Governor Tarkin (Star Wars: Episode IV: A New Hope); Quote: "Vader, release him!" (Vader actually listens to this guy)
3. The Black Falcon (Flyboys); Quote: N/A (he's mute)
2. The Joker (The Dark Knight); Quote: "Why so serious?"
1. Alec Trevelyan (Goldeneye); Quote: "Why don't you just be a good boy and die?"
Most Badass Movie And Videogame Heroes
24. Sora (Kingdom Hearts II)
23. Tony Montana (Scarface)
22. Arbiter (Halo series)
21. Marcus Fenix (Gears of War series)
20. Indiana Jones (Indiana Jones series)
19. Axel Foley (Beverly Hills Cop series)
18. Jak (Jak series)
17. Dirty Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry series)
16. Lieutenant-Colonel Bill Kilgore (Apocalypse Now)
15. John Mason (The Rock)
14. Batman (Batman Begins and The Dark Knight)
13. Aragorn (Lord of the Rings trilogy)
12. Link (The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time)
11. Captain Jack Sparrow (Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy)
10. John McClane (Die Hard series)
9. Bryan Mills (Taken)
8. Walter Kowalski (Gran Torino)
7. William Wallace (Braveheart)
6. Legolas (Lord of the Rings trilogy)
5. King Leonidas (300)
4. Master Chief (Halo trilogy)
3. Colonel John Matrix (Commando)
2. John Rambo (Rambo series)
1. James Bond (James Bond series)
Greatest Regular Bosses Ever
30. Pufftoss (Donkey Kong 64)
29. Gomess (The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask)
28. Dimitri (Sly 2: Band of Thieves)
27. Eyerocks (Super Mario 64)
26. Metal Mario (Super Smash Bros.)
25. Weldar (Banjo-Tooie)
24. Gigantic Ursula (Kingdom Hearts II)
23. Duon (Super Smash Bros. Brawl)
22. The MCP (Kingdom Hearts II)
21. Jalhalla (The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker)
20. Ganon (The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess)
19. Scar's Heartless (Kingdom Hearts II)
18. Lord Woo Fak Fak (Banjo-Tooie)
17. Mad Jack (Donkey Kong 64)
16. Molgera (The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker)
15. Kojira Kaiju (Destroy All Humans 2)
14. The Great Mighty Poo (Conker's Bad Fur Day)
13. Dragon Maleficent (Kingdom Hearts)
12. Xigbar (Kingdom Hearts II)
11. The Minotaur (God of War)
10. Mr. Patch (Banjo-Tooie)
9. Marluxia (First Form) (Kingdom Hearts: Re:Chain of Memories)
8. Volvagia (The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time)
7. Zexion (Kingdom Hearts: Re:Chain of Memories)
6. Odolwa (The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask)
5. The Hideous Hulking Lungfish of Lake Oblongata (Psychonauts)
4. Ganondorf (The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time)
3. Gigantic Ursula (Kingdom Hearts)
2. Argorok (The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess)
1. The Hydra (God of War)
Top 7 Most Easiest And Disappointing Video Game End Bosses Ever
7. Ganondorf (The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess): While he can be defeated essentially the same way as TWW Ganondorf, at least TWW Ganondorf actually tried to swing his sword and put up a fight.
6. Soviet Premier Milenkov (Destroy All Humans! 2): Throughout the game you face off against badass bosses like a KGB-guarded hippie, a Bond-like spy, a Godzilla-like monster and an Alien warship. At the very end you have to face off against this guy who is unbeilavably easily defeated.
5. Ganon (The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time): The idiot destroys buildings that help you with dozens of itmes that are needed to off it. He poses no threat so long as you don't get too close to it. Also he's a B-K final boss rip-off (if you want to know why, post it on my talk page).
4. Mizo (Jak X: Combat Racing): The fight takes place in a chase with the baddy barely even fighting back. You'd expect it to be a death match (hence the name Combat Racing) or at the very least the dude fights back but no he barely does crap.
3. Bowser (Super Mario Sunshine): The dumbass doesn't even opt to get the hell out of his jacuzzi and his is defeated when said jacuzzi is destroyed. Okay now that's pathetic.
2. Marluxia (Kingdom Hearts: Re:Chain of Memories): Okay while in the GBA version of the game this guy actually is a final boss and deserves an honorable mention. In the remake (only KH remake available in the States) he's easy-as-Hell. His two most damaging attacks are a laser and a Doom sleight both of which are easily avoided. He also doesn't even move or use his scythe. Pathetic.
1. Prince Charming (Shrek the Third): This is the one fight more disappointing than Marluxia. Although Shrek is a comedy game even comedy games have their fair share of challenges and hard bosses. The final few levels of the game were pretty tricky and in the final battle against Charming there isn't even epic music let alone a challenge. Instead you just free the eponymous ogre and so then you expect the swashbuckling Charming to put up a hard fight right? Wrong! Instead just one combo and finishing move later, game's over.
Top 15 Greatest Movie Climaxes
15. The Hunchback of Notre Dame: Generally animated movies don't really have epic climaxes and I hate Disney animated movies but a chase on the catwalks of the eponymous church over a pool of molten lead just deserves it.
14. The Dark Knight: Most climaxes focus on action but some focus on emotion which I don't like but The Dark Knight pulled off the final dramatic confrontation between Batman and Two-Face masterfully.
13. A View To A Kill: Again I'm a Bond nut so I've got 3 more Bond climaxes on this list but really a good movie climax is taking place in a normally fatal location and you can't much more fatal than grappling on the Golden Gate Bridge.
12. Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring: Boromir redeems himself by valiantly saving two idiotic Hobbits from an army of Orcs. And when he gots shot through the and stomach with arrows does he give up and die? Hell no he gets up and continues killing Orcs.
11. Commando: You don't know the meaning of the word "one-man army" until you see Ah-nold take down an entire army of security forces single-handedly which is really saying something.
10. Shanghai Knights: One of the most emotional swordfights of all time... especially since it's taking place in the catwalks of Big Ben.
9. Scarface: Tony Montana's Last Stand is one of the most epic gunfights ever and will not be easily forgotten. You gotta give him props for getting shot repeatedly in the chest and keep on going.
8. Star Wars: Episode I: The Phantom Menace: One of the most epic lightsaber duels in Star Wars history as the Satanist Darth Maul (why else does he look like Satan) manages to take on two well-skilled Jedi. Classic.
7. Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest: The crew of the Black Pearl try to save their ship and captain from total annihilation from the gigantic squid of the Kraken. Even better because it's one of the very few climaxes in which the baddy wins.
6. Quantum of Solace: While one of the worst Bond outings ever it's semi-made up in this final climax in a eco hotel that's burning down to the ground in a blazing inferno. Bond then fights the psychopathic main villain on structurally collapsing catwalks... oh yeah and the baddy's wielding an axe.
5. Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith: Not only is it taking place in a hazardous environment (a disabled pylon over a river of molten lava) but the fight isn't between protagonist and main villain: it's between the two main protagonists who have turned against each other.
4. Goldeneye: Yet another Bond climax and undoubtedly Bond's greatest foe is Alec Trevelyan who was his best friend, knows his weaknesses etc. The fight itself takes place on a satellite over several thousand feet which is incredible. I have to give props to Trevelyan since if you can make Bond bleed you deserve points.
3. Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers: As rain pours down the 2,000 Rohan desperately try to save their capitol Helm's Deep from attacking forces. There's no problem aside from the fact the opponent is Uruk-Hai and there's 10,000 of them. You can't get better than that.
2. Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End: Fantastic! Captain Jack Sparrow dukes it out against the devil-like Davy Jones on the mast of his ship. Oh yeah and there's a hurricane making it very hard to balance. But they do it and the best part is probably when Jones engages in a one-on-one fistfight with Bootstrap Bill.
1. Casino Royale: Once agian I'm a Bond nut so Bond has to top the list. Anyway as I mentioned I like final fights in hazardous environments and you can't get much more hazardous then a structurally collapsing building sinking into the Venetian canal. It also shows just how deadly Bond is. He's taking on like 7 thugs all fully-equipped with guns and yet Bond takes them down despite losing his gun beforehand. Now that's masterpiece. Plus how he kills the last thug (a nail gun to the eye) is just awesome.
Top 10 Movie Lines
10. "You shall not pass!" (Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring): Anyone who's ever seen the movie knows that Gandalf's valiant stand against the Balrog is made perfect by this one line spouted repeatedly.
9. "Let off some steam" (Commando): That is the one line you absolutely, positively have to say when you impale someone with a thrown steam pipe. Great going Ah-nold!
8. "I'll be back" (Terminator): Another Ah-nold line. It's just the kind of line that gives you the chilly-willies since you know he probably won't be back with an appointment.
7. "You've got to be asking yourself one question: do I feel lucky? Well do ya punk!" (Dirty Harry): Pure masterpiece. Clint Eastwood sets up this memorable anti-hero of a cop with this all-too-memorable line.
6. "Why so serious?" (The Dark Knight): Since it still happens relatively early in the movie here we just see how far the Joker can go. We've seen that he's a cunning mastermind who can rob a bank but this scene shows us he's crazy but deadly enough to take down a Mafia Don. Now that takes guts.
5. "Maxwell!" (The Enforcer): Another Dirty Harry line this time from the 3rd movie. I like any line that shows that the main character has gone into a psychopathic rage of revenge against the villain and after neo-Nazi Bobby Maxwell just kills Harry's partner, the dude does just that.
4. "I think he got the point." (Thunderball): I'm a Bond nut so don't be too surprised. This line has been used countless times but Thunderball is the earliest one. Plus that's also the only line that'll fit when you impale a guy with a harpoon gun.
3. "Say hello to my little friend!" (Scarface): How can you not like this!?!? Tony Montana is cornered by an army of hit men and what does he do? The sensible thing and commit suicide. No he takes out a grenade launcher and blows them to Hell!
2. "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn." (Gone With The Wind): If you want to end a relationship you never say, "I still want to be friends," and Rhett Butler knew that. Instead he ditched his girlfriend and said he doesn't give a damn about her.
1. "The name's Bond, James Bond." (Casino Royale): Again I'm a Bond nut and a Bond line just has to top this list. Now this line has been uttered countless times through the series so its deliverance has to be perfect and Casino Royale accomplished that. The movie is about Bond becoming the man the cinema audience worldwide admires and thus the final scene shows Bond's two trademarks: his music and the line. He also says it nonchalantly which is really something since he just blew a guy's kneecap out beforehand.
15 Most Annoying Video Game Characters
15. Natalya (Goldeneye)
14. Rai (Kingdom Hearts II)
13. The Dog (Duck Hunt)
12. Ganondorf (Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess)
11. John Madden (Madden games)
10. Sheva Alomar (Resident Evil 5)
9. Tingle (Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask)
8. Baby Mario (Yoshi's Isalnd)
7. Ashley Graham (Resident Evil 4)
6. Mr. Resetti (Animal Crossing)
5. Toad (Super Mario Brs.)
4. Comeback AI (racing games)
3. Kaepora Gabora (Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time)
2. Slipp Toad (Star Fox 64)
1. Navi (Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time)
That's it for now. More to come.
Lots of other users are doing this so I decided I wanted a cut of the cake and make my own. Just a few rules: 1. Ask me before including. 2. For the text box please input new name, element, weapon, rank, role (i.e. second-in-command, chief enforcer, chief-of-security etc.) and the original name (it can be a made-up one or your real one). Other than that whatever.
|title||The Epitome of Obliteration|