A name defines an object. Describes the span of it. Gives it purpose. We embarked upon the Replica Program to ensure our new power stays ours. Now, our shadow puppet, "No. i," lives. It needs a name. Something to define it. To give the hollow vessel purpose.
Day 255: Final Stages
Xion's appearance should vary based on the relation of the viewer to her. Saïx sees her simply as a puppet. The Program approaches completion. Through Roxas, Xion is assembling a copy of the hero of the Keyblade. As proof, she sometimes appears to take on his form to my eyes.
Day 322: The Plan
Be they a puppet or the hero's Nobody, we merely need a functional Keyblade master. The details are unimportant. The puppet has developed to a point where the hero of the Keyblade may be entirely redundant. Indeed, perhaps we ought never allow Sora to awaken. He cannot be controlled. He will rise up against us. We must move our agenda ahead with that firmly in mind.
Day 358: Goals
With luck, we can bring Roxas back into our fold, but even if Sora should awaken, as the hero of the Keyblade, he is bound to keep unlocking hearts. If he should come to target us, we need simply subdue him and use his powers ourselves once more. I must become one with Kingdom Hearts. I will become a higher existence. All of my true ambitions begin there.
Day 71: The Traitors' End
Saïx had a hand in what went down at Castle Oblivion - well, more like a whole arm. Which means Axel was in on it as well. It's a fact that Xemnas ordered Axel to take out the traitors, orders which went through Saïx. No specific names were given, but naturally Xemnas knew who the turncoats were right from the get-go.
Roxas is maturing at an impressive rate. His face, the way he handles the Keyblade, it's all exactly the same. The worlds seem so divided and alone, but there's always that steady thread there to connect them. And we Nobodies can never escape the things we did as humans. So it goes.
Day 256: Who We Each See
Xion's disappearance is fascinating. If she really is breaking from our control, it's a sign of her approaching the essence of the hero. It seems Saïx doesn't truly "see" her. I'm curious to know how she appears to the others. I see her as...him, though I suspect that Xemnas sees entirely something else in her.
Day 296: Hidden Truths
None of us really know everything that's going on in Castle Oblivion. Some rooms even Xemnas doesn't know about. Not many are even aware that Xion was born there. I wonder if the truth about that place will ever surface.
Day 355: Mind
The gears of Xemnas' plans have begun to spin wild since the loss of half our membership at Castle Oblivion. The results are there, but can this state of affairs fairly be called a success? If Kingdom Hearts can be said to possess a mind of its own, it is surely rejecting Xemnas - no, rejecting Xehanort. Roxas left the Organization today.
Day 119: Hearts and Emotion
Watching that foolish beast flail about only deepens my disdain for humans and their incessant need to be pinned down by feelings. We became Nobodies precisely to avoid the shackles of emotion. It was only later that we realized the scale of that loss: that some things simply cannot be done without a heart. Nonetheless, I see nary a pleasant thing about it.
Day 23: Research Entry 326
The Program is largely on target. No. i, my finest Replica, has proven an even greater success than anticipated. I intend to take the other vessel - judged unfit for number status - to Castle Oblivion, where I will subject it to further testing. One thing is clear: could these Replicas not be classified as a special sort of Nobody?
Day 25: Hollow Ties
Pressing Zexion for answers would be a waste of time. I know that, but this dearth of information is hard to accept. What's happening on the upper levels? What ought we be doing down here? They hug their truths close and leave the rest of us to speculate. Zexion talks of the bond we share as an Organization, but how could such a thing exist? Still, he remains the only one I can trust.
Day 24: The Upper Floors
Marluxia has succeeded in leading the Keyblade master to the castle. I sense multiple threads at work, but details on each of the projects are scarce. I suspect some alleged Organization projects are secretly private machinations. Marluxia seems especially suspect.
Day 26: Axel's Actions
Simple deduction suggests Axel's outwardly inscrutable actions are the result of some directive from Saïx. Why else eliminate Vexen? He simply wanted to do research. Did we not all stand to gain from the fruits of his Program? What is Axel thinking?
Day 9: On Track
Xion is being monitored. Roxas, meanwhile, has begun his training exercises. It is imperative we keep Xion from having undue contact with Roxas until we are certain it will perform as expected - which will take another 10 days, if Vexen's convictions are to be trusted. As for the Keyblade master, Marluxia will no doubt be keeping an eye on him.
Day 51: Measures Must Be Taken
The Replica Program continues apace, but something has gone wrong at Castle Oblivion. The Dusks returned with word that none of those we dispatched survived - but the news came in fragments. I still know too little to extract the truth. I doubt Axel would be among those lost, but I must plan for the worst. First, I must locate the Keyblade master.
Day 94: All Goes Apace
The hearts collected by our two Keyblade wielders, Roxas and Xion, have gathered together; and now, almighty Kingdom Hearts waxes large in the night sky. Our efforts have come to bear fruit, nearly ripe for the plucking. All plans proceed smoothly - alarmingly so, in fact, though this is no time to be deterred by paranoia.
Day 150: Dealing with Xion
As expected, the Duplicate is starting to show its limits. The Program showed promise, but a puppet is just a puppet: something to be toyed with until it breaks. I am utterly at a loss as to what Roxas and Axel see in that thing. How best to dispose of it merits my consideration going forward.
Day 171: The No. i Project
Xion failed to complete its mission. If this continues, destroying it and using the next Replica as the Duplicate would undoubtedly yield a higher-grade copy. No. i was among the initial lot, which naturally raises questions about its capabilities. At present, it is nothing short of broken. I cannot fathom why Xemnas would want to keep it.
Day 174: Just a Replica
Xion continues to sleep. All analysis on its function suggests no marked change. The copying appears to be working, but a Replica is a Replica. My latest report to Xemnas on this net me no clear answers. He simply stood, smiling. At times I find his thinking impenetrable.
Day 277: True Agenda
Axel and Roxas are up to something. No plot they concoct will change the fact that the Organization has cast off Xion, though. Our plans have split, diverged, and advance now to the next stage. The No. i project and Replica Program merely paved the way. Our true goals lie elsewhere.
Day 298: Change of Plans
Axel failed to report that the impostor and Xion are working together. Instead, that news came from Roxas. The boy is far more easily handled than Axel, but now Axel has captured Xion and returned her to us. His motives are impossible to read. Our plans can be altered if necessary, but doing so can only delay their realization.
Day 356: Unforeseen Events
Our plans never accounted for the possibility of both Xion and Roxas leaving. How did this come to pass? When did Roxas grow strong enough to outmuscle me? What were you really after, Lea? We joined the Organization at the same time, and formulated our plan. At this point, it's just an idle fantasy. Everything changed. You, and me.
Day 8: Roxas
Seems like we're getting new members every day. No. XIII was a boy, Roxas. Now we've got a No. XIV, Xion. Today's mission was to show Roxas the ropes. I feel like they've had me babysitting him since he got here. He's not a bad kid, but he's spacey. Good fighter, though. At least I won't be bored.
Day 14: This Kid?
Another mission with Roxas today. Is he seriously my responsibility? At least he's starting to talk like a normal person. Maybe that means his memory's coming back. Still, this kid's supposed to be the Keyblade master's Nobody? I don't see it.
Day 22: Castle Oblivion
They pushed up the C.O. plan. Our little hero with the key must've made a move. Me and his Nobody have been meeting up for ice cream the last few days. Not the best conversationalist, but at least he's mastered a few facial expressions besides "doom" and "gloom." I told him about C.O., but he didn't seem to follow. Guess that's understandable.
Day 28: Dealing with the Traitors
I've uncovered most of what I need to know about the Replica Program, but where's the other one? I can't find any trace of it. ...Vexen was caught in the middle. Pitiable, but unavoidable. I could not risk his Program falling into their hands. Of greater concern are the traitors. Not the obvious turncoats, but the ones who will get in his and my way. The Keyblade master is not our enemy.
Day 52: Another Mission
I've lost track of the Keyblade master and the other intruders. I'm the only one left in the castle. Everybody else has been destroyed. My orders were to end the traitors, but I think by this point, I fit that bill better than anybody. There's one last thing I need to look into while I'm here.
Day 72: Human
The longer you know someone, the less you need to speak in clear terms. Everything gets across with a wink and a nudge, a little reading between the lines... When it comes to what befell our late comrades at Castle Oblivion, ambiguity suits me just fine. But the Keyblade master and Roxas come out and say every little thing that comes to mind. Maybe that's human, or maybe they're just special.
Day 74: Xion's Face
Honestly, I never got why Roxas was so crazy about Xion. I know they both joined up around the same time, and they're both rookies, but how do you get so close to somebody who hides their face all the time? Well, I saw it today. All of a sudden, No. XIV up and takes off...her hood. Xion is a girl, and she looks just like Naminé.
Day 96: Friends
Xion regained her ability to wield the Keyblade. I don't know how or why. Maybe there's more to the Keyblade master they're not telling me about. I feel like I've been spending more time talking to Roxas and Xion lately than my old friend, Saïx. This has to have been what it was like, friendship.
Day 118: You Changed, Not Me
Talking to Roxas and Xion always brings back memories of my human life, back when I was a kid. It's a weird sensation. I ought to be able to share all this with Saïx, but I just don't feel like it anymore. It's strange, but I'm content with just missing what's gone. I'm not the one who changed. You did.
Day 152: Like a Real Person
Roxas and Xion must have had it out over something. Knowing them, it's something dumb, but still. Watching them, it's like they're human. It's messing with my head. I kind of wonder if Roxas understood all that about the wrong buttons. I get the sense a lot of it went right over his head.
Day 172: Meaning Behind the Words
There has to be something to what Saïx said. Why isn't Xion qualified to be one of us? He said to just look at her, but at what? The fact that she looks like Naminé? Xion and Naminé must be connected. Whose Nobody is Xion, anyway? What is Saïx hiding?
Day 194: The Replica
I thought I'd never see the word "Replica" again. Any rational man would realize the Riku Replica was not likely unique, but I'm the only one in the Organization who knew of his exceptional copying functionality, and that he ultimately formed a sense of self. The fact that I knew all that and still never noticed the truth about Xion speaks to how remarkable a Replica she must be.
But my questions remain unanswered. Who is she a Replica of? Naminé? Kairi? Or perhaps someone entirely different? Why did the Organization admit her into this membership? And why would such a fine Replica fall unconscious or sporadically lose its command of the Keyblade?
Day 224: Xion
Even if Xion is a Replica - a puppet - she's still Xion. I understand that in my head, but how do I interact with her now? Riku-Replica was just a tool, but I can't just use Xion. No, I was wrong to have just used Riku-Replica in the first place. How is a man-made puppet any less worthy than a Nobody that was never meant to exist at all?
They're both ambiguous. Tenuous at best. And she's my friend. Even if neither of us should exist, that doesn't invalidate the bonds we form. Next break we get, I told her we'd all go to the beach. I hope we get the chance. Our little summer vacation. I know if we can get together and laugh about stupid stuff, this nagging doubt will go away.
Day 276: Behind the Truth
Xion is gone. Roxas still doesn't know anything, but Xion found out. That's why I need to find her. We don't have hearts, so we accept the facts we're given as the truth. But something far more important lies behind that truth. Saïx would laugh at people with no hearts calling one another friends, but that doesn't make it not so.
As the Nobody of the hero of the Keyblade and the Replica of that Nobody, these two are special. Unique in every sense of the word. But that doesn't change the fact that we're friends. Nothing will. Got it memorized, Xion?
Day 297: Contact with Riku
The man they're calling the impostor, that fake Organization member? It's Riku. Roxas could very well remember that, somewhere deep in his memories. Still, it's too soon to report this. I need to know why Xion was with him first. If she's siding with the hero, it could easily mean her erasure. What are you planning to do, Xion?
Day 299: The Value of a Lie
Roxas doesn't trust me after the whole Xion incident, but I can't tell him the truth yet. So I keep lying. It's no big deal when you're a Nobody. There's no guilt, no feeling at all. So why does it still sting, just a little, when I lie to him? All my dealings with Roxas give me this bizarre illusion of humanity.
Day 301: Xion or Roxas?
Xion is burning through missions at full tilt. She seems frantic. Why, I don't know. And speaking of, I still don't know what to say to Roxas. Even without my orders from Saïx, I'd do anything to stop Roxas from being erased. I just don't know if I can stand by and let that happen to Xion, either.
Day 353: A Future That Never Was
I couldn't tell Xion she was wrong, and I can't bring myself to end her. But it's either that, or I have to erase Roxas. There's no future where the three of us can sit around and eat ice cream. I know Roxas will never understand. I don't want to acknowledge it myself.
Day 357: To My Best Friend
Roxas left. It's so like him to just leave that WINNER ice cream stick behind. Come tomorrow, I'll probably get the order to hunt him down, but leaving that here makes it feel so permanent. I wish the three of us - three? No. That the two of us could share some ice cream again someday. That's what it is to be friends.
Day 97: Sooo Bored
Every day it's work, work, work. I'm dead bored, and I'd kill for some vacay. A Nobody needs his rest, am I right? And when I get it, it's gonna be nothing but me and my sitar. Sigh...
Day 153: This Is Gonna Be a Hit!
I've got me a new hit single! X-face is always barking at me to work, but what's he expect me to do against a monster like that? I mean, stop and think about skill sets when you divide up the labor already!
Day 173: The Gamble
I find myself envying the children. Perhaps some fundamental difference exists between those who become Nobodies as adults and otherwise. The longer you have lived, the more you are positioned to lose with such a gamble. But a child can look forward, unafraid even in the face of immeasurable odds. I doubt they even see life as a gamble the way we do.
Day 257: In the Cards
The air is charged. I can feel it. You go out on a big gamble at a time like this, and you're going to lose big. That said, it's betting against the worst odds that nets you the biggest win. I'm eager to see how this hand plays out.
Day 27: Organization Dog
Axel is in the way, though I don't know if he's aware of our plot. Vexen had no part in our plans - why eliminate him, assuming Axel's orders were to root out traitors to the Organization? Discerning his motives merits our full attention.
Day 15: How Dare They
Ugh! How DARE they shut me out of monitoring the Keyblade master! And then to send me off to teach that half-baked Nobody basic magic!? I should've had him light ME on fire. It won't be long now, though. Once I'm over at C.O., our plan goes into action. No more playing nanny. Ever.
Day 50: Strange Feeling
Roxas woke up today. I think he was dreaming the whole time. Being with him feels strange. Familiar. Like listening to the waves crash up against the shore. But why?
Day 73: What Now?
I lost the ability to use the Keyblade, and I have no idea why. I don't know what to do about it. About anything. It happened suddenly, after Roxas woke up. If I can't collect hearts anymore, the Organization has no use for me. This is terrible.
Day 75: Gotta Do Something
Roxas has been coming along on my missions to help out, since I can't use the Keyblade. Axel is covering for me, so I should be safe for now. But what am I going to do if I never get the Keyblade back? I can't lie forever.
Day 95: My Past
Neither Roxas or I have any memory of our human lives. I don't even remember my first days as a Nobody. Roxas said he was the same, but I'm not so sure. For me, it's a total blank. I can't even remember the day I met Roxas, or Axel. It's all a blur.
I wasn't ready to see Roxas again. I can't help but compare us. We both use the Keyblade, but we're so different. Does he dream? It seems like that's all I do anymore. Last night I dreamt of the ocean. I was drowning.
Day 193: Dreams, or Memories?
I finally wake up, just to pass out again? Why? Because I'm a failure? I dreamt the whole while I was out. It was something nostalgic, but what? Why can't I remember? It could be a key memory from my human life. All I can remember is the sound of waves, gentle, in the distance.
Day 225: Secrets About Me
My body feels heavy, and my head aches. I'm too busy dreaming to get any rest from sleep. Axel knows something. He's hiding some secret. It must be in Castle Oblivion. That's where I was born.
Day 300: Us and the Sunset
We watched the sun set today. The three of us. I didn't think we'd ever be able to do that again. It's like that dream I had - the one where I was by the shore with Roxas and Axel, watching the sun set over the water. I just want to stay with them. But how? What should I do?
Day 321: My Place
Axel's always helping me out, so I just assumed he would again. How long has he known about me? Maybe since long before we met in Castle Oblivion. But he told me to think for myself. I was so happy. But now, as I get stronger, Roxas keeps getting weaker.
I shouldn't exist anymore. They say that Nobodies were never meant to exist, but I'm the real affront. But before I'm gone, I want to help Roxas and Axel. Even just a little. I think the boy I saw today is the same Sora from my memories.
Day 352: What I Must Do
Riku gave me this time. Axel told me to spend it thinking for myself. The Organization is determined to erase either me or Roxas. They'll never allow us to coexist. I love Roxas and Axel. I'm sure Saïx would scoff at that. Call it a trick of my artificial memories. But the time I spent on that clock tower was real.
I wish the three of us could stay together, just like this, forever.
But I have to end this. I'll never forget today's sunset. Even if Roxas and Axel do, I won't forget.
Day 354: Where I Belong
I wanted to see Roxas one more time, but couldn't. What would I say? Did I ever really exist? Even if not, I just hope that those times we spent watching the sun set were real. I know Naminé will tell me how to get back where I belong. I should hurry to see her.